A path of woody carnage has thrust itself upon the woods nearby the Bigattini Family restaurant, seemingly with no origin.
While out browsing our local selection of pens offered by our local stores on the night of September 1st, a particular witness (who could possibly be me) heard a loud crash and series of shrieks from across the street. Akin to all of the other shady events in this town, the cashier and other store goers (all one of them, other than me!) acted like nothing was wrong!
Once arriving on the scene, our witness saw a large path of shredded shrubbery, trees, and rocks. They mentioned seeing something humanoid far, far down the path who could POSSIBLY BE BIGFOOT! We cannot confirm or deny this statement, but who or what else would be walking around in the woods?
Our witness also has claimed that there were two other people, dressed in casual wear, were walking away from the scene. The witness would have questioned them, but they supposedly seemed very under the weather and not in the condition for conversation.
Well readers, what do YOU think? What could have caused this destruction? Is something shady going on with the Bigattini's? Was Bigfoot involved somehow? Let us know what you think!
If you have any tips, leads, or concerns, let us know at obrielfallstalks@gmail.com.